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Everyone has a cause. Mine is friendship.
This all started seven years ago as my three daughters began heading off to college and I began trying to figure out what would come next for me—a litigator no longer practicing, a veteran volunteer on the edge of burn-out, a small business owner no longer doing business. Which new mountain to choose?
As I ruminated, I started noticing article after article about the amazing impact that friendship can have on our health and happiness. These articles got me thinking about how much my girlfriends add to my days, and truly my life. Don’t get me wrong. I have an A+ husband and am grateful for our 32 years together, but my friends are a vibrant part of my joy in life, and these academics were explaining just how big a role they play.
Friendship: The Key to Vibrant Health and Happiness
Fascinated, I jumped in with both feet. Through extensive research into fields from neuroscience, molecular biology, psychology, sociology, and epidemiology, I learned that friendship is the virtual key to health and happiness.
It starts day to day. Research shows that if you have a strong social network, you will fall asleep faster, enjoy deeper sleep, and experience less daytime fatigue. You will age more slowly and be much less susceptible to the flu and viruses. Your teeth will be healthier. Your cuts and bruises will heal faster. And you will be more optimistic, less bothered by life’s hassles, less likely to engage in damaging behaviors, and less likely to suffer from debilitating stress.
But the big rewards come over a lifetime. You will have significantly better cardiovascular health, a stronger immune system, and a greater chance of taking preventive health measures, and as a result, you will be less likely to suffer major illness or injury. Even more importantly, if you are diagnosed with a serious malady like cancer, heart disease, stroke or dementia, you will have a significantly greater—in fact, up to four times greater—chance of surviving.
In a comprehensive study analyzing the results of over 148 studies including over 300,000 participants and a multitude of diseases and conditions, the researchers found a 50 percent increase in the likelihood of survival for participants with stronger social relationships, regardless of age, initial health status, cause of death, or length of the study. Research from the University of California following over 2,000 women for 10 years after a breast cancer diagnosis goes even further, showing it doesn’t even matter how close you live to them or how much contact you have with them: just having friends is protective.
Thriving and Surviving
Likewise, decades of research establishes that just as social support enhances physical health and longevity, it is also positively and causally linked to mental health and psychological well-being (10). When life smacks us with a major adversity or a phase of intense ongoing struggle, our friends step in and step up. I have experienced firsthand how their presence can be the game-changer that gets us through.
Friends buoy our spirits, encourage our dreams, lighten our loads, provide us with perspective, listen, nurture, share, understand, and so much more. This psychological component is especially important because the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention project depression, which currently affects more than 26% of our population, will become the second-largest international health problem by the year 2020.
Imagine friendship as an invisible coat of armor, making you resilient and defending against advancing health predators. The stronger your relationship armor, the more bulletproof you are. But the health benefits are just the tip of a very large iceberg. In coming posts, I will be highlighting the amazing, positive ways that friendship brings us happiness.
I invite you to share thoughts or experiences about the power and importance of friendship in your life.
References
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Cacioppo, J. T., Hawkley, L. C., Berntson, G. G., Ernst, J. M., Gibbs, A. C., Stickgold, R., & Hobson, J. A. (2002). Do lonely days invade the nights? Potential social modulation of sleep efficiency. Psychological Science, 13(4), 384-387.
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Epel, E. S., Blackburn, E. H., Lin, J., Dhabhar, F. S., Adler, N. E., Morrow, J. D., & Cawthon, R. M. (2004). Accelerated telomere shortening in response to life stress. Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences of the United States of America, 101(49), 17312-17315.
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7. Kroenke, C. H., Kubzansky, L. D., Schernhammer, E. S., Holmes, M. D., & Kawachi, I. (2006). Social networks, social support, and survival after breast cancer diagnosis. Journal of Clinical Oncology, 24(7), 1105-1111.
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