​Here's the Name of Every Wrinkle on Your Face

Those horizontal creases in your forehead are produced by contracting the frontalis muscle. Translation, you've been raising your eyebrows a lot. Stop acting so surprised all the time!

Treating these is one of the most common off-label uses of Botox. That means the FDA hasn't officially signed off on injecting your forehead lines, but it works to smooth them out.

Just be aware that you might not be able to arch your eyebrow in that superior way you so enjoy. That’s right, I’m talking to you, the guy who’s always asking for a “refresher” on his gin and tonic and making sly jabs about where other people went to school. You never should have been allowed to arch that eyebrow anyway.

Also known as a frown line, this is the vertical crease between your eyebrows that comes from frowning, squinting, or staring into a campfire for hours ruminating on the apocalypse.

"Men are usually most concerned about their frown lines," says Brendan Camp, a board-certified dermatologist based in northern Virginia. "Maybe because their wives or girlfriends tell them they look angry."

The trick, he says, is to fix these without going overboard with the Botox and making a guy look like a Neanderthal. A good dermatologist will smooth the line without dropping the brow, which can make the forehead look heavy.

But if you were a Neanderthal you wouldn’t have to worry about this. You’d have a simpler life: you’d worry about saber-toothed tigers.

A flock of crows is technically called a "murder." And that’s what you’ll feel like doing when you wake up one day with a batch of wrinkles radiating out from the corners of your eyes.

The treatment of these with Botox is most definitely on-label. And they're a second go-to for men.

"Treating the forehead makes you look more relaxed or rested," says Camp. "But people say they look younger once their crow's feet are treated."

That sounds good. We should just end the article here. Can we? Or can we get in a time-machine and go back to the day when I pitched this article and un-pitch it? (Back then I probably had less wrinkles.)

Continuing downward—like the inexorable gravity that takes a toll on all humankind—we come to the jelly rolls. These are the bags under your eyes. Maybe they're just a symptom of your hangover. Until the day they don't go away.

Some doctors will recommend a filler or even laser resurfacing here, but before you go all out, maybe start with an under-eye cream. One containing caffeine can help combat that puffiness. Unfortunately, there’s no cream that can combat your sense of impending mortality.

Here's a new one—bunny lines, so named because they form on either side of your nose if you wriggle your nose like a rabbit.

Seriously. Apparently some people crinkle their noses when they laugh, and they eventually get small, lines on either side of their noses just below the bridge. So. If you ever feel compelled to Botox these, now you know the jargon.

Wrinkles around the mouth are called laugh lines or smile lines. They're not funny. Wipe that grin off your face.

Now that we're in the lower facial territories, the type of treatment changes. "Using a generalization, Botox is a treatment for the upper half of your face,” says Camp, “and fillers for the bottom.”

Fillers are things like Juvederm. They're used to plump out the wrinkle, but they don't prevent movement of the underlying muscle like Botox does—which is something you want to avoid in this area.

"If laugh lines extend far enough onto your cheek and you use Botox there, there's a chance you could weaken the muscle," says Camp. "And that could affect the symmetry of your smile."

The good news (if there is any good news in this bleak, bleak world) is that many guys choose to leave these alone. You get more bang for your buck on the crow's feet. And you may never smile again.

There's another kind of mouth line. And these aren't smiley.

Marionette lines run straight down from the corners of your mouth. They make you look like you're frowning. They also make you look like a ventriloquist’s dummy.

"These marionette lines, they're from loss of buoyancy that causes your skin to become less resilient," says Camp. You're aging, you're producing less collagen, and things start to droop.

Fillers can help here, but by the time the marionette lines have appeared, will your vanity still exist?

We're at the end: the chin. This thing can't even move, right? Wrong.

"Some people are concerned about what's called a peau d’orange," says Camp, "or a 'skin of the orange' appearance."

This is the annoying French term for having an extra-dimply chin. And here, too, you can inject... well... let's just hear it from the doc.

"You can inject into the mentalis muscle to soften the appearance," says Camp. "But this is venturing into the zone of creating things to be self-conscious about. If the patient wants to do it, I usually accommodate them. But if I think it's subtle, I'm going to tell them to forget it."

Wear your subtly wrinkled chin with pride, gents. As with all wrinkles, it's a reminder that we're still moving, however feebly, across the surface of the earth.

And, look on the bright side, if it's really visible, it could distract from the wrinkles on your neck.